Thursday, December 07, 2006

A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says,
"Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, and he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."

Friday, October 20, 2006

'A little somthing from I really like this explaination of a New York. I find Chicago fits this very well too.'

... Anyway, the intern said he had never lived in New York City, and asked me what it was like. I didn’t really have a good answer, but I said, “New York is the kind of place where ten things happen to you every day on the way to the subway that would have qualified as interesting dinner conversation in Bloomington, Indiana, and you don’t pay them any notice.”

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

I'm not crazy, I'm just not you.

-- Roger R. Pearman (Author), Sarah Albritton (Author)

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

"I was born on my mother's birthday. The devastating loss of my mum knocked the wind out of me for a year. It can devastate you for a long time but you owe it to the person to get up and get going again,"

--Steve Irwin

Monday, May 01, 2006

Microsoft is changing the world!
...One headache at a time


Tuesday, February 07, 2006

One thing you can't recycle is wasted time.